


RTAH Spy AU blurb 1

by QueenCoeurl



Series: Spy AU [4]
Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter/Funhaus RPF
Genre: Drinking to Cope, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Spies & Secret Agents, Vomiting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-25
Updated: 2015-08-25
Packaged: 2018-05-26 19:06:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,485
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6251932
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/QueenCoeurl/pseuds/QueenCoeurl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ryan disappears after a job and Geoff goes to find him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	RTAH Spy AU blurb 1

Geoff stepped into the dingy dirty bar and frowned. The place smelled like self-pity and regret. The lights were low and the few patrons that were there were too preoccupied with their misery to notice him.

 The bartender gave him a nod in lieu of a proper greeting.

Geoff sighed as he recognized a man at the bar sitting with his head hung low over a drink.

Ryan had disappeared immediately after their latest job, and had made it difficult to find him.

Geoff approached carefully. He kept his hand on his phone just in case he had to send for help. Jack was waiting outside and ready to sprint in at the first sign of trouble.

Ryan wasn’t a drinker, so Geoff had no idea what sort of drunk he would turn out to be. And from the smell it was clear that Ryan was indeed drunk.

Geoff saw Ryan vaguely gesture for another round, and the bartender obliged.

 It had taken three hours to locate Ryan, and if he had been in this bar for even half of that time he would be far from sober.

Geoff gently reached out and put his hand on Ryan’s shoulder, “Hey, I think it’s time to wrap it up.” He didn’t know what was eating the hardened killer but knew it shouldn’t be taken lightly if it had driven him to drink.

“If I wanted you or any of the guys here I would have asked.” Was what Ryan wanted to say, instead he slurred, “Fuck off.”

Geoff furrowed his brow and pulled out a couple hundred dollars. He slapped them down on the bar top, “OK I’m cutting you off and dragging your sorry ass out of here.” He grabbed Ryan’s arm.

Ryan pulled his arm free of Geoff’s grip and threw three hundred dollars down onto the bar, “I’ll beat anything he throws if you can keep the drinks coming.” Ryan looked at the bartender.

 The bartender looked between the two of them.

“Ryan don’t make me drag your slobbering ass across the floor, because I will.” Geoff threatened.

Ryan stood with a sway and Geoff thought he was going to listen until he flipped him the bird while holding onto the bar for balance.

“Get me like two more of those apple thingies.” Ryan ordered the bartender.

“Appletinis?” The bartender asked.

“Sure.” Ryan confirmed.

“No don’t get him anything but water or I’ll ensure you lose your license.” Geoff wanted the bartender on his side. He turned to Ryan, “Not only are you drunk, you’re girl drink drunk.” He scolded but couldn’t hide his amusement at the coming hangover. Ryan would wish he was dead.

Ryan got angry, “Oh so when you get stupid drunk for fun it’s okay, but with me it’s suddenly a problem?!”

“You don’t drink! You can’t just suddenly binge after disappearing and expect us to be okay with it! Something is clearly bothering you, and if it’s a problem for you it’s a problem for the rest of us. Not to mention I have yet to see anything so much as phase you; never mind send you into an alcoholic spiral.” Geoff argued and sent a quick text to Jack.

“Well maybe I do drink now.” Ryan argued, “Who are you to tell me otherwise? You’re obsessed with keeping me on a leash at all times, like I’m some attack dog. I’m not a dog you can just sick on any problem! I have a life outside of the crew and it’s whenever I work with you guys that shit like this happens!”

Geoff put his hands out to calm Ryan before he started divulging sensitive information.

“I see it, you think I don’t but I do. You’re all scared of me, afraid that one day I’ll just snap and leave you all to bleed out with your throats slit.” Ryan continued, “Keep it up and I fucking will.” He mumbled the threat.

“Well you threatening us won’t help the matter, will it?” Geoff heard the bar door open and was glad to see it was Jack.

Ryan puffed out his chest and grunted, “I can take the two of you.”

“Maybe when sober.” Geoff huffed. Sober Ryan could definitely take on the two of them if they were unarmed. As for drunken Ryan, it was yet to be seen.

Jack wasn’t a brawler and wasn’t pleased to have walked in on the verge of a fight, “Come on, Ryan. Let’s find you a place to lie down.”

“If you’re going to fight, do it outside.” The bartender instructed and pointed to the back door.

Geoff gave Ryan a firm push which immediately threw him off balance. As Ryan struggled to keep himself from meeting the floor, Jack grabbed him beneath each arm and dragged him out the back door.

Geoff followed and slammed the door shut behind them. They were in the alley beside the bar right next to the dumpster.

Ryan was livid. He immediately tore himself out Jack’s grip and lunged at Geoff.

Geoff thanked the booze for slowing Ryan’s reaction time because it was clear he wasn’t holding back.

 Ryan threw a heavy right hook towards Geoff’s face.

 If it had connected it would have easily broken his nose, but Geoff was quick to deflect it and grab Ryan’s arm. Before Ryan had a chance to react, Geoff twisted his arm behind his back and pushed him up against the dumpster.

Ryan began to force his way out of the hold.

“Jack!” Geoff shouted.

Jack jumped and added his weight to Geoff’s in order to keep Ryan pinned.

Ryan struggled as best he could in his current state, “Let me go!” He whined.

“Like hell we will.” Jack responded. Getting hit by Ryan was on the bottom of his list of things he wanted to happen today.

Ryan stopped fighting against the hold and fell mostly limp. His head dropped to hang forward above the closed dumpster. A swallowed hiccup shook his body, and soon they were coming every few seconds.

 The two of them released Ryan. They watched him turn and slide down to the ground as hiccups racked his body.

“What’s gotten into you, Ryan?” Jack was very concerned.

Ryan shook his head without looking up from the ground, “I killed him.” He mumbled.

Jack crossed his arms. Ryan had killed several people today, so he was going to have to be more specific.

Geoff inhaled sharply as he realized what was bothering Ryan so badly. He crouched and put his hands on Ryan’s shoulders, “Ryan, hey.” He gently slapped the side of his face to get him to look up, “He jumped you and you reacted accordingly. It was dark, we were under fire; any of us would have done the same.”

Ryan grunted and looked back down.

“Hey!” Geoff decided to be stern, “What was your other option?! How were you supposed to know it was just some kid? It could have easily been another hostile, and then what? You’d rather you or I be dead instead?”

Jack raised his brows, “A kid?”

“I don’t know how old, it was chaos. Michael shouted when he spotted the movement. Maybe five? Six?” Geoff gave a quick explanation, “Honestly if Ryan hadn’t reacted I probably would have shot him a split second later.” Geoff stood, gestured to Ryan and mimed a knife cutting his belly up into the ribcage.

Jack grimaced but now he had a better understanding, “What was a kid that young doing in the middle of that mess?!”

Geoff shrugged, and Ryan leaned forward to puke.

Geoff and Jack took a few steps back from the mess as Ryan coughed up the last of his stomach contents.

“Feeling any better now?” Jack asked as Ryan rested his head back against the dumpster.

Geoff had his hand to his nose, “I don’t know what shit you were mixing but the fact that I can make out the appletini smell is gonna make _me_ puke.”

Ryan moaned and closed his eyes.

“Shit on my dick, I think he’s out cold.” Geoff sidestepped the vomit and checked Ryan’s pulse, “Help me get this asshole somewhere safe.” He instructed Jack.

They managed to get him hung between their shoulders.

“Watch us get stopped by cops.” Geoff huffed.

Jack chuckled, but then was quick to frown, “He’s not good with killing kids, huh?”

Geoff gave Jack a look, “Would you be?”

“No. I just, I don’t know… It hit him harder than I would expect, y'know? If he was a regular guy or any one of us I would’ve expected this kind of reaction. But not from Ryan.”

“Honestly, right after it happened he seemed completely unshaken, if maybe a little surprised. We finished the job without any problem after that.” Geoff recalled.

They reached Jack’s vehicle and dragged Ryan into the back seat, before setting off in search of a motel.

~*~

“Oi, guys! I think he’s wakin’ up.” Gavin pointed to the infrared image of the motel room.

Everyone pushed their way over to be able to see the monitor in such a tight space. They were using their mobile command van to keep an eye on Ryan. Geoff wanted to ensure he survived the night, and the rest of the crew had been more than happy to oblige.

 Ryan’s warm figure shifted once more before rolling over face down. He grabbed a pillow and put it over his head.

“Told you he’d be feeling it.” Geoff muttered, and then spoke, “So who wants to go in and talk to him?”

“Talk? Dude, last thing I want when I’m hungover is someone talking. Like give me a coffee and fuck off.” Michael chuckled.

“Yeah I’m not dealing with Ryan right now. Find someone else.” Ray dismissed the ask.

Geoff and Jack looked at each other and it was clear neither of them wanted to talk to a hungover Ryan as well. If they ended up pissing him off, it would only have him take his revenge when they themselves were hungover.

“I’m sure Meg would, but she’s out of the country right now.” Gavin thought out loud.

Michael sighed, “Alright, let me call Lindsay.”

 

Ryan heard the door open but wasn’t in the mood to care. It was probably Jack anyway, and he didn’t want to suffer his gentle scorn.

 He was thankful they had dumped him in a motel. From what he could remember he hadn’t exactly been polite, and even vaguely remembered vomiting on Geoff. They’d even left him a large jug of water on his bedside table.

 He might consider himself a terrible person but at least somebody cared about his well-being.

 As a non-drinker this was his first hangover, and he was not enjoying it. His head felt like it was carved from solid marble and he was having trouble finding something that didn’t hurt. The pounding in his head was incessant and when he finally decided to roll himself over to greet his visitor the whole room spun.

Squinting, he grimaced at the light from the window as he was able to recognize Lindsay.

Lindsay grabbed a chair and dragged it across the floor until she could sit comfortably at his bedside.

Ryan winced at the noise, but still managed to croak out a greeting, “You draw the short straw?”

Lindsay gave a compassionate smile, “No, but I was the only one who actually wanted to come. They’re scared that an irritable Ryan would have them leave the room with the bedside lamp up their ass.”

Ryan chuckled and it turned into a groan as he shoved his face back into his pillow and pulled his cover over him.

Lindsay plopped her purse onto her lap, “I made you a care package. Just some stuff to make the hangover more manageable.”

Ryan moaned something incoherent into the pillow.

Lindsay took it as permission to go into detail. She pulled some pill bottles out of her purse, “I brought you three different pain meds (because I don’t know what works best for you or what to use) and this box here is anti-nausea pills.”

Ryan stuck his hand out towards her from beneath the covers.

 Lindsay sighed, “You’re such a child.” She opened up one of the pill bottles and the box and placed the recommended dosages into his hand.

Ryan’s hand closed on the pills and retracted back beneath the blankets.

“Don’t dry swallow.” Lindsay warned.

 The cover shifted as Ryan’s other arm blindly searched for the water jug left for him on the bedside table. With a noise of complaint he laboriously sat himself up and took the meds. He emptied almost half of the jug and putting it down he pulled his blanket up over his shoulders.

“What time is it?” He spoke quietly and even then it still felt too loud.

Lindsay checked her phone, “Quarter to noon.” she then reached back into her purse, “Also got you these.” She pulled a pair of sunglasses out of her bag.

Ryan turned to see and lifted an eyebrow, “Really?”

 He was bewildered that shades like those would even come in an adult size. The base colour of the thick frames was white and they were covered in black, orange, and brown patches. The frame around each lens had two triangles on top as well as painted on eyes, whiskers, and noses.

“They’re cute.” She leaned over to hand the cat glasses to him, “And they’ll help with the light sensitivity.”

Knowing she was right, Ryan begrudgingly took the shades and put them on, “I’m now the cutest hungover hitman ever.”

“You don’t need the glasses for that title.”

Ryan scoffed and Lindsay chuckled in response.

“Oh and I saw these and thought of you, so have them as a ‘get well’ gift.” She pulled a fair sized box out of her purse.

“You need to tell me where you got that bag of holding.” Ryan joked and expected another gag gift.

“Macy’s.” Lindsay responded and placed the box on the bed for Ryan to open.

Ryan let his blanket fall from his shoulders as he reached to open the gift.

 He pulled the lid off and wasn’t sure what he was looking at, “Metal fish?”

“No you dummy, look.” She pulled one out and removed the protective plastic, “They’re knives! Shaped like different kinds of cute whales. See?” She handed the one she had taken out to Ryan for inspection.

“Oh shit.” Ryan looked it over and immediately began to open the others, “They need their first sharpening but this is high carbon galvanized steel - surprisingly good quality too.”

“Yeah, well, this one is a sperm whale.” Lindsay pointed, “And this one I think is humpback, this one blue, and this one,” she lifted it up with a smile, “Killer whale.”

Ryan couldn’t help but smile.


End file.
